The Life I Built

I started building my life years ago.
From the first moment my parents allowed me to start making my own decisions.
With their support, I moved 1725km away from home for my first year of University. With their support, I moved 2672km back and completed my studies closer to home.
I made plans for my life.

I started young, but I never let anyone “walk all over me”.
I never let anyone define me, I defined myself.
I was a strong young girl and today I am a strong woman.
I demand respect from others and I try to give the same in return.

My identity never became wrapped up in a boyfriend or a relationship.
I did not need male companionship to feel validated.
I never had a problem being independant and being myself.
Regardless of what others said or what others thought.

I married a man who compliments me.
We have built a solid foundation for our
marriage.
We are building our life together.

I had high expectations of myself. I still do.
I demanded so much from myself.
I obtained an undergraduate degree and a law degree.
I had doubts that I could do it all.
Encouraged by my parents and my husband, I did not give up.

I have made friends and loved them with all my heart.
I have given so much of myself to them and
received so much from them in return.
I have so many memories to carry me into my golden years, and
I am still so young.
I have so many opportunities ahead of me.
I have been living my life to it’s fullest.

I have been forced to realize that I cannot control everything.
One in six couples is affected by Infertility.
My husband and I are one of them.
For the last two years, the life we have built together
has revolved around it.
Plans cancelled.
Trips put on hold.
Waiting to buy a bigger car or a van.
Rooms in our house painted the colour for a nursery.

In my heart, I know that we cannot continue
to plan our life around our infertility.
We do not want to wake up in five years, in ten years
and wonder what we have done with our time.
On our quest for baby, we cannot forget to live.